Lingerers: The Summer Sequel
These absolute creeps are back / Issue 1,440
Oh, hi friends!
Back in January, I told you about my horror movie concept.
Lingerers features “tiny, creepy, anthropomorphized tasks and obligations that looove to linger.”
You might remember them.
They look like this.
They represent every lingering chore, assignment, and niggling something-or-other on your mind.
I said Lingerers love January, because they were ignored during the holiday season and it’s unlikely you’ll confront them in the cold new year. They can continue to thrive!
You know what Lingerers also love?
The month of May.
May is busy and messy and full of denouements and beginnings and who has time to return that package or follow-up on that invoice or send the slightly challenging email that actually only takes four minutes to draft and on and on.
Good news though!
It’s blockbuster season baby, and Lingerers: The Summer Sequel is coming to a theater near you.
You’re the hero, and you’re gonna kill as many Lingerers as possible before June rolls around.
Grill ‘em, chuck ‘em, outsource ‘em to your worst enemy.
Whatever it takes.
By the way, last time, some of you thought they were cute. Yeah. That’s how they get you.
“You have to keep me around! I’m comforting and familiar even though I’m incredibly destructive!”
RESIST.
Destroy the Lingerers.
You deserve to start fresh.
After all, you are the hero.
I literally sent a package yesterday that had been sitting in a box on my dining room table, almost but not quite ready to go out the door, for three weeks. There was a single book in the box, but it felt like a 500-pound weight. Lifted! Gone! Light as a feather around here now.
Please tell me this movie soundtrack includes a very dark, very creepy cover of "Linger" by The Cranberries. Ideally also used in the trailer. Here to record the demo if needed.